13 Hilarious Memories You Have With Your Lebanese Mom

We all live through hilarious moments with our Lebanese moms. Maybe they’re not funny when they happen, but they definitely get a few rounds of laughter when you recollect them. Here are 13 hilarious memories you have with your Lebanese mom.

1. Seeing “that look” you accepted dyafe as soon as the hosts offered

Nothing equates the sheer terror you felt when you caught a glimpse of “the look” from behind the host, basically telling you that “7sebak/ik bel bet”.

2. Overhearing her telling khalto Samira the secret you told her the day before

A great betrayal, you will experience no worse betrayal. Then she wonders lesh ma bkhabbera shi…

3. Waking up at 6am because we had to be ready by 10am so we can go to a doctor’s appointment at 2pm

If you wake up any time after the designated time, then you’re going to be late. And if you’re late, you won’t hear the end of it. You’ll have that reputation for the rest of your life.

4. Hearing her say “ma 7ada b se3edne bhal bet” after you busted your ass helping her all day

This will never change unfortunately.

5. Being told eno heye mesh msad2a tfel men hal bet

An empty threat. She loves you and is often quite clingy, though she won’t admit it. If you ever hear her say this, make sure you don’t laugh too hard.

6. Hearing her call out your sibling’s name, cousin’s name, even esem wled l jiran before she finally remembers your name

Like…HELLO? Am I that forgettable?

7. Watching her act surprised when you say you don’t like bemyeh

“Ma kel hayetkon bet7ebbo l bemyeh shu sar halla2 batalto tekloo”

Me, having never eaten bemye since teta forced me to try it in 2007.

8. Being presented with a colorful plate of fruits when you’re studying

An apple day keeps the doctor away, and according to your mom, it helps you pass all your exams. Fresh fruits are pure brain fuel and they help you memorize 2asbab el 7arb el 3alamiya.

9. Finding her cooking your favorite food after a big argument

She won’t say that she’s sorry, but this is as close as she’ll get to an apology. Take it or leave it. Or just take it and enjoy a good meal. It’s all water under the bridge.

10. Leaving you alone with guests for more than 5 seconds

Though you’re stressed out of your mind in that moment as you try to entertain your guests, recollecting your fumbles with your mom and siblings is quite fun.

11. Being told eno “labastkon a7la tyeb”

This is literally how we were going to school:

12. Telling her she needs to relax and you find her deep-cleaning the ceiling in the salon the next day

And then she complains that she’s tired and that no one helps her around the house.

13. Expecting her to comfort you after you painfully bump into something, but you get yelled at instead

“Talla3 edemak ya hmar”

“Bala waldane, ma badda hal2ad”

“Wlek shu bek!!!”