15 Things Only Lebanese Dancers Would Understand

Allocating the biggest chunk of your monthly budget to dance, using classes as an excuse to ditch plans, and binging on the SYTYCD archive are universal practices of dancers. If you are or ever were a Lebanese dancer, here are 15 things only you can relate to: 1. Always running late to practice because of 3AJ2A and having to change into your tights and leggings in the car à la Mister Bean style. 2. Struggling to find new classes you like because your favorite teachers left the country. 3. Asking a Lebanese hairdresser to give you a simple bun for your recital, only to end up with two hair extensions and an extravagant bridal-style chignon on your way out. 4. Never having the chance to perform the Nutcracker because there are not any (or enough) male dancers in your class. 5. Getting frequently asked by Lebanese men: “ma btenze3ij wa2ta tefsoukh?” and “fike tou2afe 3a asabi3 ejrayke bala pointe?” 6. Mainstream Lebanese guys getting instantly turned on once they discover you’re a female who can do the splits: “ah waw, farjine!” 7. When you’re at a family dinner and your brain can’t resist counting guests in eight to check how many plates should be placed on the table: “5,6,7,8”. 8. Convincing your Lebanese mom that the billion bruises on your body are from dance practice. 9. Finally nailing a pirouette when your Russian teacher wasn’t around to witness it, so you swallow you Arabic swears because she understands them. 10. Wearing your dance shoes to regular outings because they were too expensive for you to go off and buy another normal shoe. 11. Meeting other dancers in DanceWare store and acting crazy as if you haven’t seen them last night. 12. Being the only soul who hasn’t attended any of Grand Factory’s Friday parties because you had practice. 13. Getting stares from Lebanese strangers at clothing stores because you think it’s totally natural and acceptable to change in front of people. 14. Get yelled at by your mom when she sees the shower drain filled with glitter from your post-recital shower: “kam marra eltellik hol bi satmo l hemmem?!” 15. Getting dragged out of the kitchen by your mom, because you feel blat l matbakh ktir kharej dancing. More like this: The Pole Grip Empowering Women Across Lebanon 10 Frustrating Moments All Lebanese Film Students Have Experienced